a heavy sigh with lesson to be learnt.

i will not forgive myself for taking this kinda unskilled pictures. lesson learnt :: pratice and play with the camera beforehand as it was fren's camera.






i am definitely happy with this, both of them were playing with the balloons with their tummies, by the way, they are damn fit, so not much of fats on their pacs. thinking bout this pic below, i dreamt them while i had a nap in d library coz was very sleepy due to 2 hours of sleep the night before. ystday i had a nightmare, not the usual snake wrapping me in a car. i was married in an arranged-marriage. no idea who he was eventhough it was after the wedding day, cant recall his face, but someone slightly above the average looking guys. nice height. nice house compound. as far as i can remember, i talked to him very lil ie i told him to pull the thread dangling from my clothes.



******************************************************************
i feel so much better now. less panting after climbing the stairs. the doctor's words were true ie i will feel 50% better after 7 days. :) heartbeats beating at 92 perminute. but i will have to break a huge tablet, half of my last finger, into half.

it was a bomb.

the concert was amazing. nice seat i have but its kinda far from the main stage. the rela members and the organiser's staffs were extreeeeeeeemely annoying coz they dont allow my seat area to stand up on the ground, stand on the floor, cant use camera. a korean girl was caught too many times for using d camera and as far as i saw, she was given a last warning. some lil korean kids are crazy over dbsk, around 12 years old?

i am so angry when i reviewed back my pics after d concert. i set some pics into anti-shake before i snap, but i ter-press some stuffs, and d pics turned blur. so angry. yunho was like in a car and i got a nice angle and distance and he looked into the came, and its blur, moreover i stood on the chairrrrrrrr, nobody was blocking meeeeee. pics of micky sang brian mcknight's one last cry and its my fav song, perfect distance, and its blur. angry angry. bloody angry la. i snapped quite a number of jaejoong's (coz cousin was so crazy of him, she nearly cried when jaejoong and other members ended with a bang in one of d songs) but i quickly put down the camera coz i dun wanna be caught. as the result, most of d pics are the grass, the chair, and ppl's boobs. like some pics in clubs. not much of junsu's coz he seldom walked at the 'extended-stage'. i cant even spot changmin. each performed as individual too. everybody was so high during 'O' and 'balloon' song. lots of media taking photographs, fans were cooperative, no mosquitos bit me, and as usual, creative props in d concert. it was said there will be a huge aquarium, but i looked everywhere, no aquarium around. but a monster machine makes the bubles and undersea effects.

:: monster machine ::

:: preparation ::

:: dbsk will be swimming like octopus ::


lots of korean fans attended. no, they didnt fly purposely from korea. i guess most of them r from ampang, coz i read somewhere b4 that there are 4000 korean population in ampang and there are a number of korean restaurants.


should i sing dbsk's hug - english song (they have hug in korean, english and japanese) for an audition. i was thinking to apply lyricist/ composer category, but i have zero talent, and was thinking to steal beethoven's or mozart's piece. shy. nervous. talent-less. these are what i have in me. i just wish that a film director spot me in public and offer me to act. just like that idiot who was popular overnight. ;) or a music manager spot me in internet just like che'nelle's case. stop living in alice in wonderland la.

naughty hormones in my body. i hate u.

again my tears flowed when the doctor consulted me, fyi i have crybaby personality. i calculated (mind me, i just like to calculate silly petty stuffs), that i will be swallowing 240 tablets in a month, 8 tablets each day. one for stabilize my heart beats (its still 120 perminute, if i play sports now, i guess it will be like 150), one for calcium another for ... forgotten. my case is unusual ie i put on weights which i am 1 out of 10 ppl put weights. 2 doctors asked me to watch my diet, coz there is a very slim tiny chance to lose weight. the medicines will decrease the thyroid metabolisme. thyroid hormones will be taking away my calsium, therefore milk is essential for me now. but then milk makes my weight increase. health is so troublesome neeway, i can eat cabbage, brocolli, cauliflower and turnip. yippie. but then a big huge ass no to seaweed. omg, my sushi!!!!! whateva i eat, will be small portion now. i am sad. almost all ppl said seaweed is good for thyroid. never listen to ppl until u get consultations from qualified doctors.

i laughed when d doc said "just watch ur diet, if not u will be a cubby girl". my mind quickly think bout humpy dumpy.

after doctor clarified some signs of thyroid, he said that i might got it 6-12 months ago. i was so surprised with this as my body didnt show any dumb signs to it.

this month consultation and medical fees is crazy. let me count,

ear infection consultation and medicine = 160
blood test = 70
this consultation = 220
medicine = 162.50

lazy to get my calculator. tired la walking even for few steps.

and and i get shock easily. very very easily.

scenario 1 - i sat next to the phone. and it rang suddenly. i really jumped up. and there goes faster heartbeats.

scenario 2 - i saw some not-worth-living-in-this-world-fugly-snake in an email and d newspaper, again it beats faster.

scenario 3 - bro threw his temper by banging and closing his door, i was downstairs holding some papers, i jumped and hands tremored and my papers flew. this is really really bad for me.

scenario 4 - i was watching tv in the hall, out of nowhere, suddenly dad talked loudly in the kitchen, i held my chest.

scenario 5 - watching dvds especially action or whateva, one minute the scene is quiet, another minute the scene involves parangs/knives/guns, heartbeats jumped. consistent sound is preferred.

all these petty-stuffs-that-occurs-out-of-sudden that i could managed to deal with last time, but not now. am like having some 80yearsold grandma's heart.

hey hey hey!!

check this out!

http://www.winterrowd.com/illusions/

on ur speaker if u want more effective and more quality video.

how is it gonna be?

am still in dilemma whether to change a subject of mine into another which i need to get a private tutor. he is very good. he guided me last year's microeconomics. am current taking 'investment management', the lecturer is the worst. i dont understand his notes in the form of slides, he talks shit in the class about share markets, cimb, pizza, cakes, food, traffic jam and until now we are still discussing-which-day-to-change-our-saturdays-classes-coz-having-
classes-on-saturdays-is-so-lifeless-and-its-in-the-middle-
of-the-day.

its not late to change yet coz i havent paid my exam fees which is require to do so in jan. sigh.

i hope this is the last dilemma i face in my degree studies. the. last. one. and hopefully. am. done. with. UOL course. i just want all these to be o.v.e.r. and work my ass out in wu's fitness zone. =P. i have lots of fats sticking on my body.


sometimes am useless being a friend to my friends. i miss her bday and am terrible, not even wishing her, but now shes gonna date me for a meal. i didnt get to treat her, but she spent me an expensive meal last year. i always wanted to call him but always too lazy to dial d troublesome number with so many digits, but he called me from uk. no, he isnt my boyfriend or exboyfriend or crush or whatever u r thinking la.



time really flies. i pulled out my calendar, and in 7 days to come, jc will be here.

approx 16 years back.

i managed to find this in cousin's fb.
i want back my skin!!
i want back my hair!!
i want back my eyes!!
everything has changed.
am afraid to be old.
i dont wanna grow up.

i have a dream.

a white (i think) sports car came , too fast too furious, i poined and shouted at him "wah! hi!!!" and waiting for a response but he pretended to be deaf. he hopped out from his car, rushing to his house to get some cash (i guess so that he could have expensive meal with his gf) , which is next to mine, while his girlfriend waited in the car. "what a snobbish guy! still never change!", i mumble grumbly. i saw his girlfriend - for the very first time with my bare eyes playing with his mp3 compartment next to the dashboard. i read today's newspaper stated that he has been dating her secretly for 9 mths. he walked out from his house, grinning while hopping back to his car. i shouted rudely "wah, goh kiat chun , answer me! dont be snobbish! celaka betul". he said "ooh, hi!" and he just zoomed off like that.



"wake up, time to go to college", mom kinda shouted.

i smiled while walking to the bathroom.
i cant believe that i-dreamt-about-gohkiatchun.
i thought that the only person that i will dream is dean.

smiled.
unbelivable questions i threw to myself.
this is all i did on the way to college till the class ends.

am seriously think this brunei-lass is handsome. even my aunt said that after watching hanakimi.


ooh yeah. cousin gave me her spongebobsquarepants toy - 10cm height. you will not believe this, shes still collecting toys especially soft toys despite hitting 30's. she always keep a soft toy in her handbag. she has a huge spongebobsquarepants on her office telephone. last year, i spent lots of time in the library, and wanting to have someone accompany me, i brought a shnauzer soft toy and placed it in front of me while i studied.

i told her that today is dean's mini showcase in sg. wang. then she asked me whether i want davidtao's concert tickets! although i am not a big huge gigantic ass fan of davidtao and other chinese singers especially dean, but heck, i still want to attend, since she often receives tics but not gonna attend.